3 Hilarious Holidays Today You Didn’t Know You Needed to Celebrate!

Offbeat Observations: Georgia Dale’s Guide to Today’s Most Absurd Holidays

Well, folks, it’s that time again—time to toss your serious side aside and embrace the weird, the wacky, and the downright ridiculous holidays that we’re celebrating today. Yes, it’s a day for more than just Earth-loving, tree-hugging good intentions. So, buckle up and get ready to dive into these three holidays that, quite frankly, might make you wonder what kind of a world we’re living in.

1. National Jelly Bean Day: Sugar Rush, Anyone?

Now, who doesn’t love a jelly bean? You know, those chewy little bits of sugar that somehow manage to taste like every flavor under the sun—except for the one flavor you actually want. But today, all bets are off. Whether you like your jelly beans fruity, spicy, or, for some reason, buttered popcorn-flavored (seriously, who asked for that?), today’s the day to gobble them up without guilt. You have permission, so go on and make a small mountain out of jelly beans. It’s practically a holiday tradition.

2. National Talk Like Shakespeare Day: To Thine Own Self Be Dramatic

Feeling extra today? Well, get ready to talk like Shakespeare, because today is your chance to throw around some thou’s and thee’s and make everyone wonder if you’ve taken a time machine back to the 16th century. You’ll be the life of the party as you drop some Romeo and Juliet quotes in the most dramatic ways possible. “Wherefore art thou my coffee, forsooth?” Bonus points if you add a “prithee” to the mix. It’ll have everyone questioning whether you’re casting for a school play or just really, really good at pretending to be fancy.

3. National Financial Literacy Month: Adulting 101

And now, for something not-so-fun but still important: it’s National Financial Literacy Month, and today’s the day to pretend we all know what we’re doing with our money. Sure, it’s not as exciting as jelly beans or talking like a Tudor, but understanding your finances is something that will really pay off in the long run. So, maybe spend a minute or two today Googling the difference between a 401(k) and an IRA. If you manage to get through the day without confusing “interest rate” with “interest in ice cream,” you’re ahead of the game.

There you have it, friends! Three bizarre holidays to spice up your day. Will they make you smarter? Probably not. Will they make you laugh? Absolutely. So, let loose, eat some candy, speak in old-timey English, and maybe—just maybe—learn a little about finances along the way. It’s a wild ride today, and I wouldn’t have it any other way!